My sister is a stranger...?
my sister and i are 11 years apart. im 15. ok, my mother used to be married to some guy and they had a baby aka my sister, they divorced and he died and my mom remarried to my father. a year later i was born. so my dad is not her real dad, but we are still sisters.. anyways she is living with us now (she brought her baby along ) and i feel like shes a stranger
NEVER IN MY LIFE HAD I HAD A TWO SENTENCED CONVERSATION WITH HER!!!!
i know my friends more than her. shes a stranger to me. when we talk its just to say "where's mom?" or someting like that.
its horrible. i get so jelous of my other friends who say "me and my sister....blah, blah, blah"
i dont know her, i dont know anything about her. i want to know her, please help.
Update:if you have nothing helpful or nice to say dont say it. i am not asking for your critisim, but for help
Comments
I'd be less to the point as others think, like it might be even more awkward talking to her about how you feel. Maybe instead ask her for help on things, like homework or cooking, cleaning, advice about things with your parents, boys, friends, etc. She's older and would probably love talking about her opinions and what she went through. Also offer to help with the baby, then you'll get to know two people. But start with the small, unawkward stuff and it'll get easier. She's probably worried about stepping on your toes and being in your space, so make sure you make her feel welcome and like she belongs there. You'll learn a lot from this whole experience and become a better person, and parent from it. Good luck!
Just tell her what you just told us. Go up to her and tell her how you feel. You might find out she feels the same way you do, but is also too shy to say anything. Invite her out somewhere, go shopping, or just take a walk, whether she is your real sister or not, it sure would be nice to do things together, and get to know each other. You can build a relationship with someone no matter how old you are. Just remember this will be a good thing, give it your best effort.
Maybe sometime you should just say to her--"Hey, can we have a talk when you get a chance?" and then tell her exactly what you're telling us now. Tell her you want to get to know her better, and want to have a relationship with her. I can't for the life of me imagine that she would have anything against that. She'd probably be thrilled. It won't happen overnight, you will need to start spending some time together and get to know each other, but it can happen for you. I'm sure simply telling her how you feel is going to take you 10 steps forward to start! Good luck to you!
Clearly there's some gap between you both. Maybe you are both pretty independant types. Not all sisters get on. You might be a warm personality and she might be cooler.
But think ! could she be grieving for her lost father? I think there could be some unresolved stuff here. Her baby may be a trigger for her feelings about her lost dad.
Some support for grieving links...http://www.grief.net/
or
http://www.tranquilities.com/grieving-lesson-1.htm
Be patient for a bit longer.
Best wishes
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Start the conversation by asking her what she has been up to all this time. If she do not want to talk tell her about your day. Keep talking maybe she will open up to you.
She probably feels the same way. Try to find some time to talk with her. Maybe ask her to go shopping?
Don't be afraid to just sit down and start a conversation with her. Then, you can go from there.
Just give it time. It isn't your fault you don't know her, now you can get to know her. You will bond soon enough.
tell her what your saying here maybe she thinks the same as you ,,,or right her a letter