outside prospective?
I need some outside prospective…
My fiancé and I have a child together(he’s 11 months). My fiancé works full-time. I stay at home with our child and I am also a full-time student. This is my concern…
We both pay the bills, I have money saved up from working when I was pregnant ect. So, I pay half of all of our bills each month. I also staying at home with our child and take care of the household stuff(laundry, dishes, taking care of our child, my school work and so on). Is it safe for me to assume that we should be 50/50…? That he should help contribute to the household chores? I am a stay-at-home mom, yet Im not. I still pay all my bills and half, if not more, of the bills in the household. In my perspective a stay-at-home mom is mother that stays home and takes care of the children and all of the household needs while the husband makes a living. HOWEVER, this is not the case with us? Am I outa line?
Update:what I mean is... i think we should both contribute 50/50 to the house work if we are both paying th bills. being a stay at home mom was never in my cards, im a worker! i feel very fortunate that i can stay at home with our child, but i never would have imagined doing this. i feel like i am the only one who has made sacrifices and now im in charge of everything.
Comments
You'are at home taking care of the baby and doing the housechores: you work a lot at home, lady. Your husband is the breadwinner. Why are you paying half of the bills????? are you out of your mind ?.
You're setting an unhealthy precedent with your fiance paying half of the bills, - he must be so happy- you don't work outside, that's HIS obligation, not yours. Why are you taking money out of your savings ? don't be a suc---r, lady, your fiance must pay all the bills, you have the responsibility of the baby and taking care of the house, meals. Tell your fiance, that you'll not pay more bills, that you're not working outside, that you're a stay=home mum, and you'll assume your responsibilities, and expect he to meet his.
You're "spoiling" him too much for the sake of "equality", lol, and he can get accostumed to it so much, that he might turn himself into an irresponsible man. Wake up !
If you are taking care of the house and the baby than he should pay all or most of the bills. You are spending your savings and that is not a good idea. If he thinks that you should pay half of the bills then he should do half of the household chores and half of the child care. He is working and you are going to school. You are getting the raw end here. You are not out of line. If it were me I would tell him that he cannot have it both ways. He either takes half of the housework or he pays the bills. Good luck.
If you stay at home with your child, and can afford not to work, while your husband works full-time and can provide for all three of you, I don't see how you would need to have to work.
It would be nice if you could make some extra money doing a business in your own home, such as child sitting or a business on E-Bay for instance, to help contribute to the houselhold. I'm sure your husband to be would appreciate that. He should also help with some of the household chores since you do attend school. But taking care of your child and taking care of the house is a full-time job in of itself. It is also better for your child to be raised by you as the mom who's home all the time, as opposed to a full-time nanny.
If your the one staying at home all day taking care of the house and the child then he should be the one paying the bill...that's 50/50.
He should help you with some of the household chores. If your in school full time, you need quiet time to study and he should help out with the baby. Even if you weren't in school he should help out in the house. Maybe you could have him pick a room in the house that he would be responsible for cleaning on a regular bases.
Ya'll are living the life of a married couple..so act like it. None of this my money/your money stuff. It all goes in the same pot and the bills get paid. As far as the house work goes, good luck on getting him to help if it's not his nature. Men do outside stuff, plumbing and electrical. That's our nature. I would help with the inside stuff sometimes, as do alot of guys, but some of us aren't programmed that way. Sorry.
No you are not out of line. He should have to pick up after himself to help you out. You are already doing alot by paying your way, and going to school, and taking care of the baby. You are not a slave. He's got to give a little more in my opinion.
The two of you should play to your strengths. If you need help, he should be willing to help.
The last thing you want to do is marry a child. You already have a child. You are going to need him to be a selfless man.
Is he up to the task at hand?
Good luck.
as long as you are keeping the house clean and having dinner ready when he gets home and all the household things are always done by you then no you are not out of line but if these things aren't getting done and the house is always messy and dinner never ready ect... then you are way out of line