Registry items too expensive?
When it comes to a registry I am a little uncomfortable in the first place. Against other opinions I REFUSE to put one of those "registered at" cards in my shower or wedding invitations. The problem is that we have a lot of out of town guests and have been asked by many where we are registered at. So we registered. Now my family is saying that I did not register for cookware and dinnerware and so on. I did not register for it because I could not ask someone to by me a two hundred dollar gift. Is that weird. I just do not feel comfortable asking for a gift that expensive. My brother says to do it anyway because that is what the close family will get us. But I think that the close family will know what to get us anyway without it being on paper in some store. Am I just being too naive about weddings or should I put the more expensive items on?
Comments
Most wedding registries I've seen have items ranging from $9.99 to over $200. I don't know how often the couple receives the pricier gifts, but sometimes people or families will pool their funds and get the better gift. Adding them to your list doesn't mean you'll get them, it just means "I wish".
As long as you have a wide range of items for every budget (rather than ALL expensive items) no one will blink.
The "proper" thing to do with those little "were registered at..." cards is this: YES for bridal shower invites. NO for wedding invites.
The point of a shower is to shower you with gifts. The wedding is to share that special moment with you and your hubby. I know a lot of people put them in their wedding invites and it is rude to do cause that is the first thing that always falls out when opening them and looks as if you are asking for a gift. But it is your call. Word of mouth is how it gets around for the wedding gifts, or people will just give you money.
Now concerning the price of gifts. Some people want to spend a lot of money on you. Heck I had an old mad give me and my husband $200 dollars because he wanted to. Some people have money and just want to bless a new couple with an awesome gift. What we did was put things on the registry in all different price ranges. A lot of the really expensive stuff wasn't really bought, but we got a ton of gift cards and were able to go back and get those big items. But registries are the best way to keep from returning a lot of things. Cause believe it or not, people will get you whatever they want when they don't have a list, so expect some crazy stuff! lol.
Hope this helps.
If you have a wide variety of prices on your registry you will be fine. It doesnt look greedy unless everything is high priced. If your family is asking you specifically then its ok to go ahead and register for the big ticket items, they want to give you these things. Most people look at a registry as a good guideline to follow for the bride and grooms taste and alot of times people use it because its a guarantee that the gift they get will be not only appreciated, but well liked because the bride and groom picked it out themselves.
Also remember the way that you shop, would you go into debt for someone? No, probably not. Others wouldnt do it for you either, they will get you something within their price range and for some people their price range might buy a few place settings of your china pattern or some new pots and pans. A registry isnt a demand for "these gifts and only these gifts" its a helpful tool for people who love you and want to get you the things you like.
Best of luck to you!
I couldn't agree with you more! I felt the same way too. So here's the deal.
The knot.com suggestions that it is tacky to include those little cards indicating where you're registered, so don't. If people want to know word of mouth is good enough. They'll ask your parents or friends.
Lastly I too feel weird putting expensive items on the registry. My theory is if I can't afford it well why would they? So I put practically priced cookware, dinnerware and bedding on my registry. All things that I would pay and appreciate. My suggestion is Target.
Believe it or not, registry is not just for your benefit, it is also for the benefit of your guests. It takes guess-work out of the decision what to get as a gift, and is extremely convenient - especially for those who don't know the couple very well. By all means, register - and put a variety of items from all price ranges on it. You can have anything from $9.99 to $999.99; it doesn't mean you're asking for, or expecting, expensive items - it just gives everyone an opportunity to get something they feel comfortable giving. If a person wants to spend $200 on your gift, they want to feel they're giving you something you want or need - and the way to assure it is by getting an item from your registry. You don't have to include this information with the invitations. But if people ask, have the info handy. They will appreciate buying things from the registry as much as you will appreciate receiving them.
You don't have to register for every item in the book; pick the items that you really like/want/need. My husband and I registered at Amazon.com, and along with the usual sheets/dishes/cooking utensils we had books, musical instruments and electronics on the list.
Congratulations.
I understand your dilemma w/ the registry. I thought the same thing, but my Mom told me to put a few expensive items on the list for your guests that will buy in groups- like people from church or work will often pitch in to buy one larger gift, or families with older children still living at home will buy one gift from the whole family. You're family that you're closer to will also buy these expensive items, and this way they will know your preferences. As long as the majority are reasonably priced, a few expensive items should not make you look bad. Congratulations!
I didn't use a registry for our wedding, and I don't use them when I attend weddings. However, have a full dollar range of items - right from a few dollars up to the few hundreds. Just for fun. No one will spend more than they can afford. And you are right about close family, but sometimes a group of aunties or something might go together on a gift, or a group from your work.
Hurray for you that you did not put "registered at" cards in the shower or wedding invitations. That is so tacky. If people want to know where you are registered, they can ask your mom, or you, or one of the bridesmaids.
And I think it is great that you did not register for a $150.00 pepper mill which was the least expensive thing for which one of our relatives registered. That struck me as greedy.
I agree that close relatives will know what to get you, and of course, if they don't they will probably give you cash or gift certificates.
Your parents should be proud that they raised you to be neither tacky nor greedy. Unfortunately, I think that makes you an unusual bride.
Yes, you're being too naive. Even though you think your family or friends can't afford a whole set of cookware, they know what you are looking for and can get a few pans of the set or a place setting of your dinnerware. This is intended to let people know what you are trying to afford for your new home. No one has to buy what's on the registry but at least it gives them clues.
You should include tour registry in bridal showere invites. Not wedding. But please register for expensive gifts. SOme people go together and purchase them and some will purchase them on their own. Just because you have registered for items doesn't mean you will necessarily get them. Both of my girls were told to select some rather expensive items. Surprisingly, they got them!