Is this a decent poem?
Dark Blue
The slowest distance between
Two points is (dark blue.)
It’s always directed toward me
(It can’t be black.)
Dark blue,
Is the night sky (surrounded)
(With the moon and stars.)
Yet (the stars) are so far beyond my reach
And the moon gives a sideways glance
And a smirk.
All that’s left is enveloped in dark blue.
Good Samaritans (always choose red.)
Red,
Like the injured Jew
Lying in his blood
On the side of the road.
(But that’s not me.)
(I am) dark blue,
The color of (internal bleeding)
And nobody knows this
As well as I.
Comments
omg that's very nice. abstract.
but i feel a slight lack of rhythm. maybe it's just me.
well, i read it once more, and, as a matter of fact, i think it is well-made and beautiful. i get it, now, as well.
i love it, and i would love to read more of your poetry someday.
good luck!
i feel nauseous......because of the irregular stanzas, but I like the poem!