My moms clincal paranoia has came down to me as well?
Basically I don't trust anyone, by instinct I beware any vulnerable situation. I always think I'm being watched either it being a peephole in bathrooms, cameras in my parents house, FBI watching what I do on the internet. I always have to cover my laptop/iphone camera with tape just to make sure.And whenever someone wrongs me I must get revenge or It eats at me till I do get vengeance. I don't think think anyone's after me but I do assume any dude bigger than me that's with me somewhere secluded is going to gay rape me
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Start by giving yourself reasons why you can trust people or why the FBI wouldn't be tracking you. What have you done wrong to deserve this? Nothing is the answer. Try and slowly learn to trust people and you can start by letting one person in and telling them about you while learning about them at the same time so you don't feel as bad.
I hope this helps!
Trust isn't a matter of instinct. It's a learned response based on past experience and future expectation. From what you said you're not crazy, you're suffering from anxiety manifesting as paranoia.
You're probably not schizophrenic because your fears are rational but your emotional mind is miscalculating probabilities. If you didn't (I encourage you to research this) the FBI does have software to remotely turn on cameras and microphones but they don't like to use it for fear of having their worms reported to antivirus companies. My strongest suspicion is that you expected to become like your mother or her obsessing about her own fears simply rubbed off on you.
On the cross Christ Jesus shed his blood and he became sin so that you may become righteous in God’s eyes. He wants you to experiment joy, peace, and justice. That’s why he came, but it’s up to you if you want to take the decision to change and believe in Jesus Christ. He said if you want to experience it first you must repent. Take a decision not only to ask God to forgive you, but make a decision to turn away from your sins. When you do it the kingdom of God won’t be in the reach of your hands, but will come within you Jesus said.
“Dear Heavenly Father, I come to you in prayer asking for the forgiveness of my sins. I confess with my mouth and I believe with my heart that Jesus Christ is Your son, and that He died on the cross at Calvary that I might be forgiven and have eternal life in the Kingdom of Heaven. Father, I believe that Jesus rose from the dead and I ask You right now to come into my life and be my personal Lord and Savior. I repent of my sins and will worship You all the days of my life. Write my name in the book of life. In the name of the father, son, and holy spirit amen.”