Do my parents actually care?
I don't wanna seem like an ungrateful brat, but I'm not a happy bunny.
Ok, my mum doesn't abuse or neglect me or anything. She seriously cares about my education and whether I'm kidnapped or not.
However, she doesn't seem to care about my mental well being. About a couple of years ago, I compulsively plucked my eyebrow hairs out - I told her that I thought I had trichotillomania. She didn't really care and shouted at me when I pulled them out. Then, I'm pretty sure I've been suffering from a major depressive disorder, on and off since about 5 years ago. She just asks me how I am and nags me to smile and talk to her. She's an idiot, how can I when life is horrible? She would never send me to a councillor cos she'd be too embarrassed.
She's practically a perfect mother otherwise. Does she actually really care? Or does she just want someone to control in her life?
I'm sorry if this offends people with "real" problems. I was just wondering what others think.
Comments
i think it's more to do with fear on her part, sometimes parents would rather turn a blind eye if their child displays behaviour they cannot cope with, simply because it can be easier than facing up to it, i don't condone it, but i think that could be the root of it, as in all other ways she is a good mum
Hi there,
Please take my answer seriously. I have just overcome 2 years of Trichotillomania resulting in me having half eyebrows and also pulling any 'stubble' i let grew in out.
Now then, i am 25 years old, male. I tried Citalopram from the doctors then Anafranil, none worked. I then got prescribed Effexor which after around 4months virtually cleared my problem.
Make sure you are employed and have a routine, both are essential. Minimise any stress-full situations.
My condition was caused by 4 years of a very demanding relationship which ended some time ago.
To answer your question specifically, of course your mum cares about you, she most likely doesn't understand that you are probably going through a major bout of depression. Go and see your doctor and talk with him about starting off on say 50-100mg a day of Effexor and up the dosage every month or so until you see an improvement.
Hope things get better for you friend.
Oh my goodness. Of COURSE she cares - but how the heck is she going to be able to help you if you don't talk to her and tell her what's wrong?
Maybe it would be a good idea to write things down, which helps get things clear in your own head, and then ask your mum if you can have a private talk away from home and family.
Don't be put off by people with 'real' problems, everyone's problems are real to them, it's just that some are a whole lot easier to solve.
Understand that communication is very important between a parent and child. Keeping your problems bottled up and them blaming them all on your mother isn't going to help you one bit. Talking to her about stuff will. She's not nagging you, she's trying to communicate with you and it seems you're the one who keeps wanting to remain distant. Open up to her, it's part of having a healthy relationship. It isn't a matter of control as much as it is guidance. You don't know how to deal with life because you're young, she's there to help you and you need to let her. That's what parents are for. Don't think of your problems an less important than anyone else's. It's obviously very important to you or you wouldn't be looking for help.
your problem is a real problem, and if your mother doesn't understand that. go to the doctors for yourself if only to sort yourself out.
and with the mother thing, maybe she cares, but she doesn't know how to handle what your telling her as maybe she hasn't had like any experience of it
sit her down and bring the website up, tell her how your feeling show her other websites to do with trichotillomania and remember this is all new to her so give her time to understand what your telling her a day or two then maybe suggest you go to the doctors together
say something like
"i know it might be embrassing for you to take me to the doctors to get help, but mom i need you to do this with me. i need your support i need help" etc etc
hope i helped
also i just thought if she has a problem with like going to the local family doctor there are other doctors and surgurys you could go too!
mind for instance (:
x
there is no need to apologise depression is a real problem, your mum probably does care but like a lot of mothers (mine included) if she doesnt understand something she will try and pretend it doesnt exist, you didnt say how old you were, if your a teenager you can go to your family doctor on your own to talk to him/her about your depression symptoms, theres no need to suffer on your own. get help maybe talk to another family member. good luck
My mom did no longer look to care lots whilst her father died. yet, she did no longer relatively be attentive to him her mothers and dads have been divorced earlier she became born. If something the only reason she became unhappy is via the fact she did no longer have a father to enhance up with or perhaps get to be attentive to him.
Do you think you should see a counsellor or therapist? Then tell your mother, and don't simply assume that she'd be too embarrassed. You can still go to your doctor and ask him or her to refer you to a therapist if you feel you need it.
of course she does. evryones elses mums can be just as annoying as well!!! just think positive and stand up for yourself. be the person you want to be and she will realise that you are very precious to her. good luk!!!
ignore un useful answers ... speak with your mum its a hard thing for anyone to understand!! your mum wants you to do well thats all
:)