How do i become less paranoid?
Since i was small i found it really hard to make friends, people wouldnt like me because of the way i looked or sounded etc. anyway i always found it hard through primary and secondary school because i was always bullied and had very few friends, people would always laugh and make fun of me and talk about me in nasty ways.
So i have now found myself in a situation where I am at someones party or out with friends somewhere and someone may whisper something and may look at me or something and i get very paranoid that they dont like me or are saying nasty things about me and my confidence is very low.
My boyfriend doesnt like it because I never give him much time to think when he is with me, if he goes quiet for a little while or seems annoyed in his tone of voice i get scared and paranoid that i have upset him or that he is thinking that he is unhappy with our relashionship etc, and we both hate it because it makes me anxious and what not and he never gets time to think or be quiet because i always think something is wrong.
What im basically trying to say here is i dont wanna be like this anymore and im scared that i may be like this for a long time, im 16 now and i really want it to end because its ruining my social life
can anyone help me??? xxx
Comments
I believe you first need to stop thinking about what you think others may or may not be. I am not 100% sure of to much but I am sure you cannot read minds. You really need to be more focused positively on you and your relationship than you are on what you perceive others may be saying/thinking. Where is your self confidence, esteem and integrity? I will ask you the same thing that someone asked me many, many years ago, when I was young and foolish and my ego preceded me as well, "What makes you think that you are so important that everyone else is talking about you"? And boy did that hit me hard but I never forgot it and it was the best piece of life that anyone could have ever given to me, both then and now. It shattered my ego and set me free too. I then could focus on what was really important in my life, instead of everyone elses. That was over 25 years ago now, and when I start to get caught up in this type of thinking I remind myself of what she said that day and I find balance once again. You need to think about this as well. There is nothing more exhausting than getting ourselves delusionally wrapped up in what we falsely perceive others may or may not be thinking and/or saying. And who the heck cares anyway? Live your life and enjoy what you have, before you lose it.
You have the worlds largest ego if you think that people have nothing better to think about except you. As much as you think those people are putting you down, that's how little they think about you - period. Get over yourself and start to have a good time, start by honestly admiring the people arround you. See a gal with pretty eyes or a nice piece of jewelry - say how much you like it. If the drinks or food are well made - compliment the hostess. Start being a person who values other people. If you don't value other people, stay home.
simply hold reminding your self its now not rather there. even stare at your again within the replicate for like 30 min, you'll get a well intellectual % that there's no zits there. i'm the identical approach with my face. use to have zits rather dangerous
Your young and things will change and I know that saying that does't help but what can you learn here?
How about not caring anymore about what people think about you?
That will give you more freedom to live and enjoy yourself.