Proofread my Descriptive paragraph please?

Possibly the messiest place I have ever laid my eyes on is my grandmother’s kitchen. Overflowing with pots and pans, the cupboards in her kitchen were also crammed with over fifty kinds of Chinese Herbs and Spices. Small puddles of oil and grease along the stovetops were filled with pieces of cut-up vegetables and dust. With constant gurgling and bubbling, pots of soup on the stovetop would often spew out like volcanoes, staining its surroundings with grease. Matching the discolored walls, the kitchen counter is often littered with smashed vegetables and occasionally a forgotten vegetable or fruit drooling with sticky juices. Located at the corner of the kitchen, the sink sat alone, out of place, accompanied by an empty soap dish and a half empty bottle of detergent.

It would be nice if you could help me find any errors or maybe add a little that would improve my essay.

Thanks!

Comments

  • One thing I have been learning about in my comp II class is that you should always write in third person.

    Or another way to write that paragraph would be:

    When a person goes to college, most professors prefer the use of third person in essays written for class.

    I really liked your paragraph. I would add the word different between fifty and kinds

    Keep writing and add just a little more to it. You have a really great start.

  • ...." the murky is thick with soil...." does no longer make experience...." no longer too lots added away . . ." no longer FARTHER those Shacks seem to no longer have been lived in no longer to no longer have not been lived in

Sign In or Register to comment.