bridesmaids delima~ help please?
i will try and keep this short~
so one of my bridesmaids is being a total pain in the ***! she hasn't gone for her final dress fitting (all my other bridesmaids already have their dresses done!). When i emailed her to make sure she could make it to the rehearsal dinner she told me she 'has a hair appointment that day and can't rebook it...'
I would like her to be in my wedding party because she's the one who introduced me to my fiancee~ but i just don't know to do anymore since she doesn't seem to care about anything for my wedding.
anyone have any advice on what i should do.. thanks!!
Update:i mean my rehearsal (not just the dinner- but the whole rehearsal...)
Comments
How incredibly rude of her. Is she perhaps jealous for some reason? Is she upset she is not MOH??? Perhaps the best thing to do would be have another bridesmaid very very tactfully talk with her (or someone familiar with her like her mom). How far away is your wedding? There is no reason she can't rebook her hair appointment and if her dress does not fit then I say tell her to sit in the audience and watch the wedding. Sorry she's causing so much pain. How considerate of you to have asked her in the first place because of her role in you meeting your hubby. Try not to stress about it and enjoy your day!
It is too bad that this girl does not understand the important role you have asked her to fill. I guess you have to decide whether or not her being in your wedding is worth her inconsiderate view of her responsibilities as a bridesmaid. If it is, then try to go on and not let it ruin one of the happiest times of your life. If you think you would enjoy your wedding events more without worrying about what she might do or not do next, then ask her to step down. It is your day and it should go your way. If she doesn't go along with that way then you need to be able to either ignore it so it doesn't bring you down and say to heck with it..I am happy and that's whats important OR you tell her it is causing you too much stress and it might be best with her busy schedule of hair appointments, etc. if she just attend the wedding instead of being in it. Only you can decide which is the better answer. Good luck!
Sounds like it's time to have a heart-to-heart with her. As calmly and rationally as you can, explain to her that you're concerned whether or not she wants to be a part of the wedding. Tell her that you want her to be a part, especially since she introduced you to your FI, but that you're concerned because she hasn't seemed to made getting her dress a priority, as well as attending the rehearsal dinner. Say that these things are important to you, and if they're not a priority for her then there is a problem. It might be best if she just attend as a friend and not a part of the bridal party.
Good luck!
You must sit with her and tell her, directly to her face.
This is a wedding, not a party
Weddings require a great deal from the bridesmaids. Punctuality is critical. Tell her you are getting a sense that her heart inst really into all the details and perhaps she would feel more comfortable being a guest instead.
If she says no, she still wants to be a bridesmaid, give her a list of MUST DO's without fail. (Have the list ready when you arrive)
She MUST be at that rehearsal - dinner or not. Period!
just be honest and ask her if she wants to be in the wedding party or not. You have too much going on right now to focus on her, if she doesn't try to get the dress done then that's her problem, at least you know you tried. Your wedding will be great with or without her, don't worry about it. Your wedding is a special day and it's all about you, don't let anyone ruin that for you.
Oh my God, she is being a nightmare. A hair appointment is not exactly mission critial, when compared with the wedding rehersal.
It seems odd to me that she is going out of her way to be difficult and I think with this one, email is not the right way to get it sorted. Pick up the phone!
In a nice way, ask her if there is something going on in her life that will prevent her being your bridesmaid and if not, could she re-consider her hair appointment.
Talk to her.
You need to step up and confront her. You must ask her and let her know before hand that her answer wont hurt you, if being your bridesmaid is a burden for her because is sure looks like so and offer her to lift the burden and graciously let her know you'll be 4ever grateful for introducing you to your future husband. Don't let this ruin your wedding memories.
Oh my goodness!! As if weddings aren't stressful enough without your bridesmaid not turning up for her dress fitting!
Well, if i were in your shoes, i would phone her and say something along the lines of. . ."Are you sure you want to be part of my wedding? Because it certainly doesn't seem that way! You haven't gone for your dress fitting andwhen i e-mailed you, you said you had a hair appointment, well if your hair appointment is more important than my wedding, you can forget about it!!"
lol. . . .does that sound kina evil??
OR. . . .
hehe. . .
you could do what i normally do and ask another friend of yours to say something to her and pretend you know nothing about it! lol. Just trying to help!
Well, best of Luck with your wedding!!
Have a lovely day and enjoy yourself!
xx
She doesn't seem to truly be involved. She has other "priorities".
Just because she introduced you to your fiance, doesn't mean she is the same person or it is the same "memorie" if she is present.
She isn't showing any interest. You are "beating a dead horse" on this one.
I would go with the bridesmaids you have now and just invite her to the wedding itself, not the wedding party.
even though your wedding is all about you, it's not all about you. she has a life outside of your wedding and can't just drop stuff because you called. however if she promised to be at a certain place, then she should honor her word. everyone has to respect each others time. ask her to take care of the final arrangements for her dress and to show up for one rehearsal dinner. rehearsals should not be excessive.