Post Traumatic Stress Disorder?
I'm apart of an intensive outpatient program and they have talked a lot to certain people who have PTSD and it all sounds really familar personally. I have severe anxiety/depression.
About ten years ago, my family and I dealt w/ an emotional/sometimes physical abusive alcoholic father. I've never really told anyone this before, but I figure it's the internet. Nobody knows me. He'd lock in my room when it was thunderstorms, throw stuff at me, hit my mom, keep me in the dark because he knew I was scared.
I still haven't gotten over it and I'm wondering if this sounds like PTSD to you. I don't have flashbacks, but I think about it sometimes. I get very easily startled. I'm always afraid somebody will start yelling at me or do something horrible to me. I can't cope w/ being in the dark by myself. I'm still afraid of "monsters under my bed" and I'm 19 yrs. old.
I'll prob. mention this to my Psych or in group. What do you think?
Update:I'd also like to add that I've dealt w/ a lot of derealization, almost as if I'm in a out of body experience 24/7. I've blocked out most of my childhood and now my teen years. I can't remember what I've done a week ago to a certain extent. I feel like I block everything out or I'm just not present.. like my body is and I feel emotions, but I'm not really all there.
Comments
Physically abusive,emotionally abusive alcoholic father may result in PTSD from childhood (or even teen/ young adult) experiences. Usually you are most vulnerable as a young child.
Easily startled (esp if exaggerated, such as jumping), and the blocking out of memories especially is telling. Fear of yelling and abuse also would fit with childhood or enviornmental PTSD.
Sometimes the psyche has to block things out in order for person to function; this would fit with losing memories.
One good friend was very much abused emotionally, mentally, and some physically by an alcoholic father from toddler age onward....she blocked most of childhood out but decompensated and started having panic attacks & depression after age 35. Took a great counselor to unearth the reasons. She is doing well now.
I am in touch with many people in abusive or hurtful relationships. One woman was terribly abused by her mother at a very early age; she blocked most out but started having dissociative episodes and flashbacks when her kids were in high school.
See links, and talk to your counselor to get things straight, understand yourself and your limits ASAP.
That is the key to improvement.
I even have had PTSD for a year now, after dealing with a existence-threatening concern with my husband. I even have (heavily) overwhelming stress and important melancholy. i attempted Zoloft for a month, it helped the melancholy some yet did no longer something for the stress (which might set off awful flashbacks). My healthcare expert switched me to Effexor, which has dramatically decreased the two the melancholy and stress to attainable ranges (not extra flashbacks!). it particularly is the drug from hell, despite if--section outcomes could properly be severe (I had some undesirable ones for sort of three weeks); I took it for sort of 7 weeks final year then provide up chilly turkey (questioning i became into ok). The withdrawal became into unbelieveable! there is not any thank you to describe how undesirable it became into. This time, whilst my healthcare expert says it particularly is time, i'm going to particularly wean off the right way (which I understand continues to be undesirable). in spite of the negatives, Effexor pulled me returned from the threshold of suicide. My suggestion: do countless examine on PSTD and option drugs & treatments, talk on your therapist and/or psychiatrist approximately each little thing, and specifically, do no longer provide up! i'm going to no longer have conquer PTSD yet, yet i'm desperate to achieve this. i think of it particularly is a important part of the conflict. reliable success to you!
its a good idea to talk about it, i dont know whether you have PTSD im not a doctor. as for the fears thats perfectly understandable it takes time to get over dont worry about it. thats a **** family. good work by being part of a group good luck