Is this a poem " As sadness comes"?
As sadness comes, I watched you build your cage,
Your cell didn't allow your wings to spread
And cages were now built to hold your rage,
Soon stacked one on another with hateful thread
A view from inside still saddens my mind,
As crowds pass by with their raucous laughter
And point out your every flaw they can find
While locked in your cage you cry there after
While suns grow darker and nights settle in
And you lay in your cage thinking of death,
Still waiting to see the next day begin;
To see the crowds as fear comes to your chest
As crowds arrive and I walk from your cage
I burn pictures of you and turn the page
Update:yes Sue as I progress I sometimes go back and redo old posts
and clean them up, you're good my friend, this one was over 11 months ago
Comments
I am not sure what part exactly it is, and perhaps it is the whole, but I feel connected to this poem. It is raw and invokes memories. Thank you
This is a sad story with too much truth. The first stanza is your best and pretty much tells the story. Each bar of the cage was constructed by the very prisoner it holds.
Yes,it's a true great poem speaking about a person in a parable.
I found out long ago,some can not be caged .I broke free
Freedom is valued,not being tied and bound in words or thoughts.
Definitely a poem. I am fond of the use of a cage as metaphor, perhaps too much so. This one spoke to me but with a multitude of meanings. Quite Universal.
Poignant write here Fredric. Sadly some build their own cages. I have seen them do it and some do not manage to break free.
I think I am just not a good enough audience for this. Nothing per se wrong, I just find the thing too oblique. But that is me, not the poem.
Now Fredric, you KNOW when you write something that really, really touches me, I remember it.
So 'fess up, this is a repost, is it not? Man, I know I remember it! Maybe a tad touched up, but it's the same. Now, I only say this to show you how your significant writes stay with me, to honor you, not to complain!
I thought of John Merrick (The Elephant Man)
Good write Fredric Thank you