My self esteem is low, help?
When I walk around in my school (junior high) I feel scared or embarrased to walk alone. I can't put my bangs up b/c of zits If I do I'm afraid someone will laugh. When I'm swimming in my bikini in public places Im afraid people will laugh at something. I'm 13 yrs old, 5 foot 2 and 97 pound, my doctor sais I'm underweight, I barely eat, I excersize alot so I don't put on weight.
What should I do??
Update:I have had a past, my dad left and I have no clue why. I date guys to fill my dad's spot, so I have a guy tell me he loves me. I don't choose to live this way! I don't want to live this way! I want to know that everythings fine but it's not! I hide dating from my mother because she doesn't approve.
Comments
1) Don't worry about zits. Everybody has them. It's puberty, it's life. Some people use stuff lie Proactive or Clean and Clear. Others hide acne up with foundation, which just makes it worse. I would suggest washing your face once a day, everyday. That will clean out your pores. That and touching your face as less as possible.
2) If your worried about swimming in a bikini, get a one-peice bathing suit. They may be a hassle to put on, but it covers more and is more comfortable.
3) I'm thirteen, too, so I know how you feel. You are a little underweight for your age, so I suggest eat more. It's not just that, you probably have a high mentabalism, which means you burn off fat like KAPOW.
If you eat three square meals a day, then you should be set.
Keep your head up. Things could be a lot worse.
Love yourself and love others as you love yourself. Keep exercising, keep eating healthy and keep going to the doctor. Build muscle mass on your body to fill it up and give your body a nice shape by adding weight training to your routine. Change your shampoo to one that is less abrasive Thus reduce zits on your forehead and try using Proactive products. Instead of thinking about what people think of you start think about how you feel about them. Start with the shoes and work your way up then look inside that persons heart and develop your own perception or value for the company around you. You are just one out of a thousand. No one is going to care so much about judging you.
The best way to overcome fear is with confidence. While you are developing yourself focus on the best parts of yourself and present that. What you are bold about is what will stand out and what people will see. So if you maintain your focus on what you don't want people to see then that is what will show but if you focus on what you do want them to see then that will show. None of us are perfect but it's what you are bold about that shows the most.
To build your self esteem start setting achievable goals for yourself and work toward them. The more success you have the more value you will have for yourself. For example Getting an A in class or joining a sports team or School Paper. Get more involved in student activities. Make more friends. Instead of hiding in the shadows climb the mountain and stand on top. Not for the respect of your peers but for self respect. You must claim who you are. Say to yourself I am somebody. I am "Your Name" with boldness and this is what I am about. It's what you believe and do that has meaning in life.
Your esteem level is lower than you might like but only because you have yet to develop your coping skills. In time you'll be less focused on what others think about your appearance. You'll be more concerned with your performance in school, in your chosen profession, in social interaction.
Instead of demanding so much of yourself, why not pursue your known strengths and let others take responsibility for the things about you they don't especially like? It's not your problem---it's theirs!
Len
Im going to be controversial and sayI think you should go down the Buddhist route on this one and try and understand the self does not exist.
http://www.wikihow.com/Develop-Self-Esteem