low self-esteem. plz help? :(?
i am the middle child, and i'm 13. i definitely do have MCS (middle child syndrome). i always put myself last & i feel like i'm unwanted & is just taking up spacing. my sister called me selfish before, & i almost cried. i know i'm not, but for some reason when she said that.. i was ready to give everything that i own away.
My friends are great, but i feel like they would be better without me. when i was in grade 6, for the full year i was depressed. i would get home from school & cry in my room for a bit. my mom & dad both works until 5ish.. so i usually am home alone with my older sister because my younger one in over to my neighbors. i felt like no one wanted me & half of the time i cried over nothing.. even the smallest thing could make me want to cry.
finally, this year, i felt better. i lost almost 20 pound, got new friends, & started looking at things in a better way. but the sad thing is.. this feeling only lasted a few month.
no, i am not considering my self depressed now, but i am not happy.
i don't know what it is.. i just feel like everyone would be better off if i was dead.
i feel stronger now then i did before, but i could still easily be torn down.
some of my friends know i use to be depressed, but no one knows that i kind of still am. none of my family knows i have even felt like this.
i feel like everyone has more fun than me anyways & don't want to listen to me go on about how i feel. i feel like i'm not important enough.
can someone plz help me?
what should i do to try to fix this?
should i tell someone?
am i ever going to feel better?
advice would be great, thx.
Comments
You're okay, but you need to cake care of yourself for Avoidant Personality Disorder.
Hi there,
I know EXACTLY how you are feeling, ok? My name is Melanie, and I am the author of the book, "AA Not the Only Way," where I talk not only about my prescription pill addiction (luckily you don't have that) but ALSO about my depression. I am actually now officially "diagnosed" as Bipolar 2, which is where I have a lot of anxiety, coupled with a lot of depression (GREAT! It's the both of best world!) But I know I didn't really tell anyone about how bad I could feel, and I had a suicide attempt a few years ago. So I think, first off, it IS really important that you let SOMEONE in your family know, whoever you trust the most and feel most comfortable with, about your depression and that you sometimes feel like you're just not that important. Telling someone is the first step, which might make you feel a little better, in and of itself.
Second, you should really go to a psychiatrist to get evaluated. I mean, everyone gets depressed, but there are MILLIONS suffering with some sort of clinical depression or bipolar or some sort of mental problem, and if you are one of them, it is important to be seen by a professional and they might recommend you get on some medication, which might make you feel better too. Now, I am NOT a doctor, so I am simply recommending that you go SEE a doctor, ok?
Also, if you just want someone to talk to, you can contact me. You can email me at [email protected] or call me at 310-658-0990. Please do not hesitate to call. I hope this helps you in some way. It CAN get better...I KNOW it sucks now though! Also, a good diet and exercise and if you do anything like yoga or meditation, this can greatly help too.
Well grade 6 was about the time I got depressed too. I'm 36 now, but yeah...that was a rough time. I'd just been moved to the fourth city in 4 years and was about to get moved to a different school again for junior high.
I'd say, try to get involved in some sort of club that interests you. Pursue all your interests, whether it be writing music or exercising, taking a yoga class, or whatever. Take some magazines and cut out pictures of who you'd like to be or whatyou'd live to do or have and make a collage out of them. Post it up where you can see it. Try taking 5-15 minutes out of the day just to write down what you want in life. Put it up on your myspace page, or twitter about it. You might find you get more opportunities coming your way.
I'm 13 too, currently in 8th grade. And to be truthfull i've never been deppresed in my life ! But there's always something that makes you feel better, for me it's the ability to make other's laugh. Goof of a bit, be more laid-back. Cause knowing that you can bring laughter to someone even if it's just a giggle could bring your confidence sky high (: Deppresion at 13?! **** no !! Look for physical or mental characteristics that make you special between your siblings.
maybe try to do something new that would make you happy, something you can look forward to doing and (i know this sounds really dumb and cheesy im sorry..) set goals. if you can work towards something and achieve it (oh my god so much cheese...) then it might help. you also might want to realize that things could always be worse. also, sing!! my guitar teacher told me that music is theraputical, but if you sing, its coming from yourself, and could make you feel better. um what else... excersising and eating stuff with antioxidants... like grapes, make you feel happier.
i hope i helped, good luck!!
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hey, you gotta remember your family loves you, and your friends are your friends because they like you. dont feel bad if someone lashes out on you, there just say the wrong stuff when their angry